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about
For me, this song is about the relief of coming out of a spell of delusion, even if momentarily, even when you know that sometime soon you'll once again find yourself swept up in stories, delusions, self-pity--whatever your Thing is.
The vocals and acoustic guitar were recorded on a whim in a single take on the couch of a dear friend I was visiting from out of town and hadn't seen for too long. He then surprised me a few days later with this mix, having quietly added some beautiful accompaniment on keyboards and additional guitars. The love and effort he put into the song blew me away and just made my goddamn day.
Nevertheless, I managed to then spend a few weeks full of self-doubt, overthinking this song and wondering whether it was 'good enough' and worth sharing, whether my voice was too awkward to merit anyone's ear.
The clouds eventually parted again, thanks to some encouragement from a friend, and I could once again see that it's not a cosmically big deal to record a song with a friend and then release it into the world, that there's no one standing at the gates here whose blessing I must receive before being allowed to upload this song to bandcamp, that this is my life right now and if I want to express myself I have to just do it and stop thinking about it.
lyrics
Fmaj7 - Bb - Gm7 - C7
I was where I was, and now I am where I am.
I still wish I hadn't taken it so seriously.
I heard what I wanted to, and I said what I said.
Sleepwalking through the party deliriously.
Bb - Bb - Am7 - C7
Stories will sweep me up again.
It was all their fault. I was helpless at the helm.
Certain that the turbulence was external.
I was somehow better than, yet a constant victim.
Certain that this curse was eternal.
Self-pity will sweep me up again.
Gm7 - C7 - Gm7 - C7 - Am7 - Bb
I can only tread water so long
Before I let myself become
Food for the food,
Part of the ocean.
Delusion will cataract my eyes again.
But will see clearly again eventually.
credits
released May 27, 2022
Sunk Coast - co-production, acoustic guitar, vocals, songwriter
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